Leadership Principles: Lead From Within
This is where the rubber meets the road for us as leaders. When we lead, we lead as ourselves. The good, the bad, and the ugly. Sure, we can fake it for a while but I think we all know that when we do, the true us eventually comes out. So how can we be the best leader we can for our organizations and teams?
Well, if we lead from within ourselves I think it must begin with leading ourselves well. First and foremost, we must be leading ourselves before leading anyone else. I have a friend that does a lot of leadership development and uses this “leadership pipeline” to develop his leaders. The leadership pipeline is a fairly common term. You can do a google search of it and find plenty of examples and thoughts. However, they all pretty much begin with leading yourself before leading others. This is true of leadership at any level as well as in any organizational model. I believe the best leaders do a few things in order to lead themselves well.
I think the first thing great leaders do is spend time getting to know themselves. Self evaluation is rarely easy. Most people are either too hard on themselves or think too highly of themselves. I believe more the former than the later. Our life experiences have shaped us into who we are today but they are also the lenses by which we view life from and therefore the lenses we make our decisions through. When we realize that and really try to be mindful to how these things may be influencing our decisions, it helps us become better leaders. I’ve also found resources like personality and enneagram assessments to be helpful and I use them in my team development often. It points to who we are at our core, how we’re wired, and often times can act as a GPS from where we are to where we want to be.
If we truly understand that our experiences, both good and bad, have formed and shaped us then we’ll begin to understand that not all of our “decisions lenses” are going to be good ones. If we lead out of a place of wounding, insecurity, or frustration we won’t lead well. My hope and advice to you would be to get help when needed. I recognize that this idea of “getting help” means different things to different people and settings, rightfully so. I would also argue that the degree of the wounding or experience would dictate the degree of help we need to seek. Sometimes, a conversation with a trusted peer or mentor could be that help we need. Other times, it may need to be more of a counseling, clinical, or medical help. I understand that even as I typed that, there’s a stigma that comes with it but in order for us to truly lead ourselves well in order to lead our people well, we have to take care of the things that could be holding us back. The truth of the matter is, we’ve all had things in life that have hurt therefore we all need some level of restoration.
Lastly, great leaders have learned to take rests. Yes, vacations are nice but time away won’t fill you and heal you if you don’t know how to properly spend your time on. To truly have rest built into your life and leadership is to have margin and to truly have margin we have to learn to say “no” to things. The tricky part is we can’t so no to all things so we have to figure out what things. Life and leadership come in seasons. Some are busier than others. That’s part of the ebb and flow of leadership. In those busy seasons we may not be able to say no to much if anything. Sometimes we just have to push through. I would encourage you that especially in those busier seasons, always have rest on the horizon. I’ve learned that sometimes the best way to say “no” without saying it is to ask the question, “can this wait?” If it can, let it. If it can’t, knock it out. For the most part I’ve learned the seasons of my life. I typically know which ones are busier than others. Every now and then I’ll get a surprise but I’ve got it down well. I’ve learned to take time going into and out of those times and spend some extra time with my family. Yes, we take a family vacation every year but I’m talking about taking an extra day and just being with them. This really has helped me, and my family, in developing margin. We must find time to rest, if not we’ll burn out bright.
What are some other ways you look to lead yourself well? How do you try to live this out in your life and leadership? I encourage you to spend some time doing some self evaluation, getting help as needed, and finding times to give yourself some rest. If I can serve or support you in any way please don’t hesitate to reach out!
Stay the course! Keep pressing on! You have what it takes!